My 10yo nephew is being bullied at school. I was bullied as a kid, and everything I hear about what he’s going through in that respect is so familiar.
I remember the ‘friends’ who think it’s funny to tease & don’t understand the hurt they inflict. I remember crying at my mother in hurt, anger and abject confusion, just as he does to my sister. I remember feeling that nothing I could do was ‘right’. But those memories don’t hurt - after all these years I actually remember them, or at least the people, with a certain wry amusement and affection, because I know this: they are part if what made me who I am. It’s been a struggle & there still are, shall we say, less desirable side effects, but I am basically fine with who I am, so I kind of have to be fine with my past, & really, trite as it may sound, it does get better.
People get nicer, more mature. You meet nicer people. You even meet likeminded people, & that’s an amazing thing. For some of us there are fewer like minds, but they’re out there and worth it.
I told my nephew: you just have to hold on to this: no matter what someone says or does to you, you are you, you will rise above this, you will not let them drag you down. Sadly, you threaten their self-esteem so they want to drag you down to pull themselves up. Ultimately it doesn’t work for them, either.
Good people, good friends, will carry you when you’re wounded, lean on you when they’re tired, and walk beside you when times are good or bad. Sometimes your paths will diverge, & when you meet again the years will fall away and it will be like yesterday. They are rare, like gemstones, but you will find them as long as you are true to yourself, & then they know that you will be true to them too.
Remember, you are someone else’s rare gem they’re hoping to find.
Patience is hard, I know, but I also know you’ll (all) get through this.